Mewsletter 3 - Birthday Yellows
There’s a certain sadness that comes with birthdays. It’s like the dying of a favourite song, or a sinking helium ballon. This year I wanted to sit with the sadness, so I turned my phone off and spent the day by myself.
There is always so much pressure to have a good day on birthdays, and we tend to rely on other people so heavily for our happiness. They can make or break our day.
Perhaps we need others to soothe the yearly reminder of our own mortality, or to validate that our lives bring meaning to the world. Or maybe it is because birthdays are the one day of the year we are forced to look ourselves in the eye, and we try to avoid that the same way we find any excuse not to meditate. Are we going in the right direction in life? Are we staying true to who we are?
This year I had a great day celebrating myself - I bought myself balloons, went to Lorne and wore my favourite undies, and I realised birthdays are a sacred day where we can celebrate ourself and all we have achieved over the past year.
In terms of happiness, I am reminded of a quote by Robert Pirsig that says, “The only zen you find on top of the mountain is the zen you bring up there.” The only happiness you find on birthdays is the happiness you bring yourself every other day of the year. And anything else given to you?
Well, that’s just a bonus.